These funny joints…..

Well if you have been following my near non exsistent blog, you will know I have not been in the best of health, anyhow, yesterday I did a bit too much, so I’m paying for it today, I woke up with the top of my feet hurting, I wouldn’t mind but it’s not as If I dropped anything on them, it’s just one of these ‘symptoms’ I have if I do too much, that and weird dark bruises in weird places too, places I KNOW I haven’t bruised you know! Anyway it’s a little cold and my joints are not wanting to play much, at least my hands aren’t too bad today, but the rest of my body is suffering, I took my son to school today so that to me is good, but when I walked home it took me a while because I kept having to will my hip to walk, then to make matters worse I needed the loo, haha, too much info? yeah I think so, by the way I did make it home to the loo haha!!

I am taking this opportunity to not only have a little grumble but to also say I’m hoping to put a new blog up with my crocheted projects, I’ve just learnt how to tunisian crochet, and I also learnt how to do a graph picture out of crochet and how to do filet crochet, so I am going to post them once I start, I’m just finishing up christmas gifts then I shall put it here to show :) Well not here but on this blog, as a new blog…erm you know what I mean..right?! Hope you are all having a better day than me!! Take care

ab

x

Ali P, is what we in the ‘know’ call it!!

Well not only have I not recovered from that virus, I’m still weaker than I was, though I can walk 3 days a week half hour the most at one time, that to me is progress, slow progress but progress all the same, but now I am currently under investigation for Rheumatoid athritis. If that isn’t enough my body thought that hair loss would be fun to throw in too! So last june/july I found a bald spot (or rather hubby did) while I was cleaning the old house, we went to the doctors and she said it may be alopecia and that she would refer me as urgernt to the dermatologist…I’m still waiting for that appointment, it’s been over 6 months, the waiting list is 8 months, and this is my journey, I’m going to show it in pictures as it is easier for you to see.

 

    This is the day I had the fever feeling and a lump behind my ear, it went downhill from here!

 

This is the OMG picture, the day my world fell apart…again!

I cut my hair short, the itching and the pain in your head..you would never believe!

 

This is what my short hair, was hiding, the hairdresser did a good job, fair do’s!

 

I think this was before I cut my hair short actually!

 

Started to find more patches of hair, more hair on the pillow more hair doing daily things, more hair in food..LOL!

 

Then I shaved off the bottom, I was starting to get even more worked up at the amount of hair falling out…:/

 

Then, my wonderful hubby shaved it all off for me, see the wig on the cupboard, it helps when you have no hair!!   

 

you can see how many patches there were appearing!  

 

I had had enough of the itching and all that, so I used hair remover cream and then shaved the rest off, sore but much better!!  

These are pics of my (badly) shaved head with patches, I was a cheetah!

 

 

and another :)  

 

A Synthetic wig (it loooks a lot worse for wear now!!)  

 

Another wig! I bought 3, only 2 were suitable, I had to buy them online from China, as it’s all I could afford. I had to pay import charges, so if you do go down that route make sure you check on that!

So that is my hair loss story in pictures, if you are suffering and feel alone and like no one, not even those close to you understand, the alopecia forum is an amazing place, and feel free to comment here in the guest book too, I’ll try my best to get back to you. I’m at home and near the computer more at the moment so I will help if I can. May you all have a wonderful day/week /year.

Until next time.

Ab

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Update 2013:- Can we start again please? Can we start again..?!

Well, I’m really not sure where to start! We moved house eventually, in June 2013! What a load of stress that was.

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So I’ll tell you what happened, if you have read my earlier post you know we were having a bit of problem buying the house on the seller’s side, however then it really DID hit the fan! We had agreed in advance with our landlord that we would go week by week as we were ready to move but the seller was having problems his end, and all was fine, but then one day out of the blue she (I know I said landlord, it just sounds wrong if I say landlady, it’s like a pub manager or something!) said can these people come and look around, we said, well not really as our stuff was everywhere and we didn’t want people coming looking around you know got to be careful with burgulars and that ;) Anyway she basically wasn’t going to take no for an answer so we gave in and said sure. 

The people liked the house and I knew they would want to rent it, what I didn’t know is that our landlord of (nearly 7 years) would want to chuck us and our 6 year old son out on the street!!! So we had a email off her saying that we needed to be out from either the mon(could of been tues not sure now) and this email was on the Friday, or if not, then we would have to be out within 4 weeks! Now not only is this illegal on her part as we had agreed to go week by week, but she kept putting pressure on etc etc, so we phoned shelter (the emergency line for people who are about to be homeless?) and they were amazingly helpful, so as you can see it was a little more stress added to that! Cutting a long story short we eventually managed to move into our new house, before we bought it as the seller was very kind to do that, or daft or both, but I think he knew we were genuinely wanting to buy the house, if it wasn’t for him and his kindness we would of been living in sheltered accomodation. When we tried to get our deposit back (well that was fun!) she refused as we had left (a very small) hole in the carpet, when we had moved our settee as it had pulled a bit on the carpet. This is classed as wear and tear as it was ‘accidental damage’ however she was claiming our deposit was not about to be returned because of this! Well that was it we though no way is she taking our money, so we sought advice and found that she hadn’t put it in the scheme which she should of done, after numerous times of asking which scheme she had put it in, and no reply we had no option but to threaten her with cour proceedings, next thing she is on the phone crying and upset saying that we were calling her a liar and that she saw us more as friends (Friends do not kick a family with a 6 year old out surely?!) and that she was upset and she wasn’t well etc, my husband said that may be the case but business is still business and that we needed the money, we eventually agreed on having most of our deposit back and giving her the £50 we would of given her in the first place if she had asked nicely and not gone out of her way to be a bit of a cow! 

While this was going on and we had been cleaning the said house so it was nice and clean for the new tenants (good luck to them!) I bent down to pick something up and my husband said, Ab, you have a bald spot, I said “what?!” thinking he was joking, but he wasn’t he took a picture and my world fell apart…!!! (I will write another post just for this, it going to be long!)  So not only did I have the stress of moving house, our previous landlord claiming we were liars and trying emotional blackmail (she phoned saying how sick she was and that she had to write her will that week, and that she was basically on her deathbed, and when my hubby saw her she did look skinny and ill, and it may be true, but it’s hard to believe when a few weeks later I saw her facebook profile from a friend of a friend and she was sunning it in LA having the time of her life, not someone who is sick and has to be in hospital constantly!!) but also the fact we may not of had a roof over our heads and now losing my hair..fun times! we never like to make it easy on ourselves! So there we go now your up to date!! :) Please go and look at my new page and my hair loss journey…only if you want though :)

Take care, happy living

Ab

-xx-

UPDATE!

Well my Grandad go through that operation, he was up and eating food, it was amazing, I finally got to see him for 5 minutes but then he wanted a new phone, so I was sat there on my phone (on the net) searching for a phone, bless him.  Because he managed to come through that op he was able to have another op today, it was a big scary op, to remove that horrid C!! They managed to remove most of it and have put another stent int (it’s like a seperator I think) so now he is intensive care, my dad is trying to put on a brave face for me (or us kids) I think, but I feel that the next 24 hours are probably critical, that’s how these things normally work isn’t it? I just hope that all this isn’t for nothing I hope he wakes, but some times things work in mysterious ways don’t they?  By the way did I mention he is nearly 90? He is also fitter than most of us young ‘uns, that puts me to shame I tell you!! Well that’s me signing off for today. *fingers crossed*

Oh and we have to wait another week, May 20th to move..but it looks like it may not be until the week after again! That means it will be a bank holiday AGAIN!! (please no!) I asked the universe to help with both My Grandad and the House :)

I’m back for how long? Who knows?!!

Well I’m much better I can actually do most things, though I do keep getting reoccuring illnesses I pick up anything going around which is annoying but apparently that’s the way it’s going to be for a while, I’m told I have to rest as I’m putting too much stress on my body so here I am once again taking it easy…I hope to get back to running soon but (SHhhhhh!!)

 

NEWS!! By the way I thought I would announce the news that we are finally buying our own home, no more renting for us, however as we are the kind of people that can never have an easy life, we have been delayed by about 6 weeks (from the moving in date!) typically british don’t you think?! So now we are basically living with the last week stuff (and have been for the past 6 weeks) Believe me it’s so frustrating, I keep thinking OH! I’ll do that and then Oh no! I can’t it’s in the garage, box/shed etc etc!! 

Also I packed away our summer clothes as when we should of been moving it was sooo freezing and cold and then it decides this week to be lovely and sunny and I’m invited to a family BBQ and I had nothing to wear (no REALLY!) So I found a t-shirt that was like a vest with a few holes in the bottom, shoved a vest under it (that worked!) and put on my jeans earrings and a necklace, I didn’t do too bad if I say so myself! HA!!

Well that’s all I’m doing for today , now excuse me while I go and rest and play Candy Crush and do some crochet ..oh and the sun looks like it’s coming out again! YAY! 

I’m worrying about my grandad again at the moment too, he’s not too well, having an op today and everyone on tenderhooks waiting to see if it works! *sigh* sometimes life is just hard!! (oh can you see what I mean about the stress?!)

Road to recovery is long and slow…!!

Well hello all, what a wonderful and sunny day it is outside, yet I’m stuck here with my friend lappy (that’s what I’ve named my laptop!) and we have been keeping each other company while the hubby and child return to work, I’m still not well enough to get a job, and I have a feeling it may be a long time until I get back to being “myself” again, however on the plus side I still don’t have as much Endo pain as before, it’s replaced by neck,back,muscle pain and fatigue, I’m still not sure which one I prefer!!!

I have been told I have Post Viral Exhaustion, which is fab because everything I have read says that there is no point fighting it you just have to accept it and it probbly will take a year or more, yes you will have muscle pain, and gland pain and sore throats and headaches, but this is part of the package, your body has been through the mill, so it takes time to recover, well I never have been one to do things by halfs I tell you!!

I am such an independent person that I find it very frustrating knowing I have to sit and rest all day, and if I need to sleep I really should (but I haven’t been…shhhhh!!), and yep I won’t be able to cook or clean for a while and If I do beware as it will come and bite me on the butt!! So I have to accept that my husband is now my carer yet again, he has once again had to take over, by making most of the school lunch and his own :( and making dinner when he comes home, I’ll make it up to him once I’m better ;) (I meant by making some nice home cooked grub..geez some people :))

Well this is all I can manage to write, most of the time I’m just playing games as my right arm isn’t as weak as the other so I can manovere the mouse around, however this typing is rather hurting all the muscles in my left arm (as I’m touch typing), so as always thanks for reading and take care

xxxx

I’m a survivor?! So why do I feel so terrified of the outside world?

 

 

 

 

 

Well it has been an eventful week and a bit I must say, I fell poorly once again, which was typical as I’d managed to do the “Spartacus” workout for the second time and thought ya, I’ll be able to manage the other one when I come home from a family wedding I was going to! 

 

Well I made it to the wedding and I didn’t feel too bad, but then we went home to get changed for the “night do” and I HAD to go ad lie down, I took some strong painkillers as I felt so feverish, I had a little nap, but still felt a bit rough, but I knew I would make it to the after do now, I felt my right ear and had a little lump behind it, as a week before I had been to the doctors and they had said I had some fluid in my ear but it was healing nicely on it’s own, I didn’t think much of it, the wedding and after do was lovely (even if the music was so loud I couldn’t hear anyone unless they literally spoke down my ear!!) That night I felt rough again took more paracetomol and then again in the morning, made it through the day and the terrential rain and storm that we had on the way home O_O (no kidding, there were people trying to wash the water out of the drives it was so sad :/)

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Anyway once we got home I still felt rough, put the monkey to bed and then I lay on the sofa with a duvet around me and started to feel worse. I got the doctor out (that was a job and a half) and she said, I had some sort of virus and my glands were up, If I felt worse or the glands got up even more she would do blood test for glanular fever, she gave me some painkillers and said that there was nothing else to really help! 

My throat started to hurt even more, if you have ever had tonsills out when you were older… well that sore throat is very NEAR there, but this sore throat is the worse sore throat in the universe (and I’ve had a few, I tell you!!), and my neck hurt like nothing I have ever felt, my eyes couldn’t stand ANY light or any noise, it just felt like my head was going to explode, then I started with a rash, just a little bit of spots on the side of my face, I thought nothing of it, just knew I was poorly, I went to sleep and woke up at 2am, I felt super rotten, tried to go back sleep, I couldn’t by 3am I took some tablets, and tried again, then I just got worse and worse, I said to my husband, you need to call nhs direct,(it’s a health service provider, where we tell someone the symptoms, they then put a nurse on the phone if need be and send an ambulance if necessary!) by this time, my neck had swollen on both sides and the rash had spread all over my face, and legs and arms and we did the “glass test” for meningitis, but the spots disappeared but still, we were a bit worried, my chest felt like I had an elephant sitting on the windpipe and as if there was fire going through my windpipe, I felt so weak (and I’m a pretty strong girl!), and I knew something wasn’t quite right, the nurse thought so too, so she sent an ambulance, I was VERY upset, I didn’t want to go to hospital!!

 

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On a positive note I got to ride in an Ambulance :) I got to the hospital and I was shivering by this point, I had bloods taken and the rash became worse on my face and became a lot more raised, I felt like hell, any light hurt, I wouldn’t even let the doctor put the light thing in my eyes, and I couldn’t open them fully anyway!! By this time my glands on either side of my neck had come up, as had all the lymph nodes (did you know you have LOADS in your neck?) my face was swollen, and I really did look like a human football!! I was not a very well girl! They said it may be mumps (now I’ve had mumps four times, three official and another when it felt the same, and I can tell you this was NOT mumps!) My symptoms were closer to glandular fever, the doctors and nurses were so great on that day and the next, but when they said I could move to a ward Infection control rang and said I couldn’t as now I had to be quarantined as a precaution!!  So now everyone had to wear masks, aprons and gloves, I finally got the all clear to go, but then that ward didn’t want me just in case I infected the people on the ward, then I had to wait for another ward, finally a room was ready I went all the way up to the ward, only to be told I had to go all the way back again as they wren’t ready for me, I waited again and finally was in my own little room, I felt awful, the room however wasn’t bad as hospitals go, the view was lovely, it was of the beautiful countryside and the car park and the sun was shining, but I couldn’t enjoy that much as the light hurt so much, they had to close the blinds and the black out blind, it had a tv in too, I needed the loo, but couldn’t use the “normal ones” I had to use the commode, this was my little prison for the week and a bit, if ever I needed anything I had to ring the bell and the nurses would have to put masks, aprons and gloves on, I felt sorry for them, but they kept apologizing to me, but it’s protocol isn’t it, they just do what they gotta do!!

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Anyways many blood tests poking and prodding later and no one was any wiser, my immune system was shot at, apparantly I had a really low white blood cell count, which is obviously not good, I had some kind of viral infection but they weren’t sure what, the nurse said to me that she thought it was viral meningitis, and I got to agree with her, I really honestly thought I was a goner (going to die) I have felt bad before and I have had bad pain before but nothing and I mean NOTHING was like this, my head and eyes and body just felt like I had ran 3 whole marathons in a day with no drink not stop and no food, that’s all I can say my body was so weak and tired and the pain in my neck and glands and shoulders was awful, I would not wish that on ANYONE!!

So I’m lucky to now be back at home with my hubby and my beautiful boy who I daren’t let come and see me in the hospital for fear he may be struck down too!! So I missed my baby boy so much and he missed me, when I got home we just hugged and he kept staring at me as if he couldn’t believe his eyes (he’s 5 years old), if this has taught me anything it’s taught me to live the life for the now, so as much as I would love to lose weight and as much as I would of liked to do this and that, now I’m just going to live for the now as you never know when you can get struck down, you never know if something is going to take it all away in a split second, my Nana died so quick and then I fell ill so quickly, you never know, I am going to carry on eating healthy but my focus is not on losing the weight as it has been, it’s just on keeping myself alive, this time I was lucky…!!!

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Yet thought I do feel lucky as such I’m slightly terrified that everything has germs, I’m super worried I’ll get a relapse and wonder how I’m going to cope if and when I go back to work, I’m frightened that there are germs lurking everywhere trying to get me, to make me ill again, and how is my immune system going to fare a second attack, I’m not sure if my body is strong enough, then what would my son do without his Mama, all these questions I presume are natural but I don’t feel as though I can air them as the people around me love me so much, I know that and I don’t want to bring them down but there you go, these are my worries.

As always thanks for reading! Happy Living :D