The Battle Begins

Well I finally think my whole body is recoverd..took a while didn’t it? I’m not sure what happened but it wasn’t nice, I’m going to try and cycle the days in between, I might even cycle to work each day (it’s only 15min walk so won’t take too much out of me!) so hopefully doing that, and maybe do some swimming when the leisure centre finally gets back to me, (not both at same week/time!) and then I can start running again, have some chicken waiting for me for when I come back, drink plenty water day before and on day, and hope that I won’t need a wee stop mid run (yes that HAS happened before!) I need to lose the weight so I’m already eating pretty good, I am having a few days where I’m eating a little bad but nothing compare to the binges that I have subjected myself to before.  So me and my sister are going to start again tomorrow, we are more determined than ever not to give up, not sure where to start from maybe we will do test run and see how far we can run, just by timing and then go from there, that may be a good idea, I really really struggled last time so fingers crossed this time by body has recovered completely because I’m really really really missing my running!

 

On a different note I have finally managed to walk into town, walk into a few shops and get some things that I want, I like and need for work all in one morning FINALLY! I’m a proper size 16 which I’m pretty chuffed about, last time I was this weight I still couldn’t just walk into a shop and buy a size 16 and know it was going to fit It was try 18 try 20 try 16, so frustrating and so depressing when I had lost so much weight, but I think the running I had done had helped me tone my body a little better or something I maintained my weight this week but next week I am hoping for a good weight loss!! I’m needing to be back in work, needing the routine, but am slightly scared too as I haven’t been in over the summer and always feel a little sick because of the unknown!!

Well wish me luck and Britt, if you read this you are doing fantastic and you will reach that goal !!

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The Day I Found Out My Grandad had cancer…again!!

Well after hearing my Nana had the all clear, we didn’t even have time to celebrate as now a few weeks later my Grandad (her husband!) has cancer again! For the second time, it seems there is no rest for this disease, My Nana had already had breast cancer twice and she has battled and won again, I hope my grandad is able to fight off this horrid disease too, but his is in his stomach, he left it a few days before telling, I don’t know why, perhaps he was scared, he has to go to Liverpool to get a op, as they can’t do it here, he is 82, but they said they think he is strong enough, though it is still pretty risky, if it doesn’t work then he will have chemo too.

When my Nana had chemo she lost sooo much weight, she wears a wig, but it’s fab, her hair looks amazing, don’t know how I am going to cope with battle two, if he loses weight it’s going to be well weird as he is already thin and if he loses his hair it’s not like he has an option to have a proper wig is it? How do I deal with this? I have NO IDEA!!

My way to cope I think is the need to run, but I don’t know how to make my body do what my brain wants, but I gotta find a way to release this stress or I shall become depressed again and I don’t want to be in that dangerous place!! So now I’m going to try and blog how I feel what my day is like etc!!

Oh and I found out that a little boy in the place I work has died along with his little sister in a car crash abroad, it’s awfully upsetting he would of only been 5, my little boy is 4!! It just makes you realise even more how special your children are!

Well there you go, thanks for reading. Blessed be.

Hi sorry for the delay!

Hello I am still doing my running but between muscle ache, fatigue, and trying to lose weight and having a lovely week spending time with the two men in my life, I’m not having much time to post..I will soon though I promise. Thanks for being patient.

xx

 

p.s. I no longer resent myself 😉 and my sister who was on week 2 is on week 4 run 2!! Well done my little Pip!! 😀